AL QAEDA and ISIL, BOKO HARAM and HERDSMEN'S REGROUPING

ISIS ( Islamic State of  Iraq and Syria), also known as ISIL ( Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant), is said to be a Sunni Jihadist group with a heinous ideology that claimed to be a caliphate, and exercise religious authority over all muslim. This group is said to have been an ally of AL QAEDA before its fraction was declared.  ISIL is recorded to have been more successful than its fore runner. In the same vein, Bokoharam which is also a Jihadist militant sect which is based in the north eastern Nigeria, and also active in chad, Niger, and nothern Cameroon has also become a threat to some parts of their captured countries, and some herdsmen have recently been linked to be in alliance with the group.

Islam is a religion of peace, so I heard, and so I want to believe, but these dreaded groups which keep regrouping, rebranding, and recruiting all in the name of the religion stirred a great fright in me, and so my thoughts seem confusing. I pray thee, receive sense! I pray thee, wise up and see beyond the minute intention tied to your quest which can be consigned to oblivion for all I care. I waited for some seconds to ruminate over what could be the cause of terrorism, and I couldn't exhaust the list I thought about, but yet, some accurate delusive visionary quest which is second to none.  Religious, political, citizenry rights, vengeance, country supremacy quests and the likes are not worth the trade of lives and souls to dark worlds, I emphasize.

Threading the path of religious arrangement, I believe every supreme being is powerful to fight for himself, and a need for the believers to understand that a wasted effort is being channelled into assisting their God/god in fighting against people who flout the norm and belief of the religion. As much as politics is concerned, terrorism only makes the process difficult for those that once used terrorists to achieve their political status, hence a demand for ransom to free a state or country is demanded by those used. In cases where this is not achieved, the tentacle of terrorism has its wings spread all over such territory in exchange of failed promises by political juggernauts.

Citizenry rights can be achieved by peaceful protests and constructive dialogue,  but in a case where blood is shed to claim rights, it is a planned greed intention blindfolding the sect behind such rights claims.  Karma is the best revenge if you seek vengeance.  There is no reason a whole country or state has to suffer for what some group of people did wrong. In a quest for country supremacy, I have an opinion that no country is supreme in itself. In other words, a country cannot be supreme without the assistance of others. The joint effort of different countries make a country's vision achievable, so why terrorize?

I see terrorism as a personal quest of wickedness, and evil threat, as well as hooliganism in its advanced realm. Religion, political rifts and all other reasons are not enough to be destructive. If all you wait for Is a million wives reward that will be given to you by your supreme being, then you have set a standard of failure, because greed of sexual pleasure has overshadowed your right to empathize. For those under recruitment, I hope you are ready to kiss peace goodbye, because you have signed a life contract with restlessness. A life that terrorizes doesn't rest, and this brought me to a conclusion that terrorism is not of this world, but the under world's, because every sane human wants rest.

HOW DO I CELEBRATE MY CHRISTMAS? (Every Child Deserves a Christmas)

How do I celebrate my christmas? I am pretty sure so many answers are popping out of your mind. I think I can guess a few, with a big pot of jollofrice or friedrice, shredded chicken and salad, or with an all red wears and accessories, or a trip to an island or low land, or with lots of drinks or santa gifts, and with so many beautiful things of life to mention a few. All these things are so good, but I will share a story on how exactly one needs to celebrate a christmas.

About six years ago, my church youth members organised a visit to the orphanage, and most people that were present there were well bred people, but they never saw that like an avenue to ignore the less privileged, but a chance to extend love. I was like a spectator taking note of everything happening around as we got to the orphanage. I saw some children sharing their thoughts with some of my members, and there was this particular boy that insisted on going with a lady. He felt the love the lady shared to him. She carried the little boy and started asking questions; how are you doing? Have you eaten? What's your best colour?, amongst other questions. This little intimacy made the boy feel the love of a parent he never had, and he couldn't watch the lady leave.

This story above symbolises that anybody can be a parent to an orphan, so far you share true love to the orphan. All they need is someone that can care for them, and make them feel relevant, and I feel you can be that person. I think I have given you a clue on how to celebrate your christmas right? Yes! Every Child is a Star (ECIAS) foundation has brought to mind that every child deserves a christmas, and a need to share love to this set of people during this yuletide season is as important as sharing it with our children. They need to feel the festive mood, as well as see people outside their confined environment.

You can get engaged in this process by teaming up with NGOs around you, personal visit, or you can team up with Every Child is a Star(ECIAS) foundation, they will carry you along with details below. And I am sure you will have a beautiful christmas testimonies this 2018. ARE YOU READY!

#SMWLAGOS 2018, THROUGH THE EYES OF A CURIOUS ATTENDEE

When I first thought to write this opinion piece, it was with such a high spirit that i would have gone on my WhatsApp status asking if anyone was interested in reading my review on the recently concluded #smwlagos (Social Media Week Lagos), and some of the vital lessons business owners especially those who couldn’t attend the event could glean from it. I must have honestly hoped no one responded to my clarion call, unfortunately I received a torrent of interests from friends and acquaintances and therefore was bounded to keeping my word…..but just when my pen met her paper, it felt like my memory had gone on a quick recess. You’ve probably met that feeling of “who send me message biko”…lol. I guess I'd have thought what more can I say that you do not know already. But since I’ve committed myself to breaking out of my shell, my already cracked shell in 2018; coupled with an intense nudging from an amazing friend who wouldn’t let me stay any more in my comfort zone, and of course Remi Owadokun’s “it is #TooLateToBeNobody” haunting me, this article is materializing and indeed morphing to be a great blessing in disguise. It is my sincere hope that you find a reference point as you read this article, even implementing one or two things from it.

Lets back off a little....perhaps you’d like to know how I got to be a part of the #SMWLagos. I heard about #smwlagos in 2017 through a post on my Facebook timeline but couldn’t participate of it because of the short timing, nonetheless I made a mental note to attend the next one. At a strategy meeting my organization held in January this year, I was asked by my boss to take note of the upcoming #smwlagos2018, so that I could write an article on the program and how social media is bringing the world closer?!

And though I wasn’t told I could attend, it seemed like the universe was secretly on my payroll. I silently nursed the idea of attending even hoping my luck would get me a week off to fully attend the event, lofty wish you’d say, but I must have tipped the universe so well, so well you wouldn’t imagine the shock I had when my boss said that I, together with a colleague have been given the following week off for #smwlagos! OMG! I went numb from too much happiness speeding through my body system, something leaped within, and I must have strongly resisted the urge to punch my fist into the sky. I am super grateful for the opportunity, somehow I hope my boss gets to read this piece too for it wouldn’t have been possible if not for her kindness. So we registered online and also applied for a Paypal account (first business collaboration/strategy I noticed which I’ll talk about and the others as we progress in this series) and was given a Campus badge pass...and off we were to what would be an awesome time altogether.

Being a personal development enthusiast, I find myself attending different events that inspire, motivate and ignite me in more ways than one, but #smwlagos was really redefining, for in a period of 5 days I was greatly exposed to lots of Entrepreneurs, Thought Leaders and Industry giants with the options of choosing what mind blowing sessions to attend from the many on the ever interesting list. The people, the fashion, ambience and willingness to learn coupled with the great and upcoming, all meeting on a platform where there are no holds barred made the #smwlagos a noteworthy event that any entrepreneur or personal development enthusiast should attend. While learning hasn’t been a chore, it was absolutely fantastic to find people who were likeminded with me in different sessions all focused to become a better person.

WHILE YOUR PRESENCE AT THE #SMWLAGOS WOULD HAVE BEEN GREAT, I BELIEVE YOU CAN LEARN ONE OR TWO THINGS BY ATTENDING THROUGH MY EYES, THE EYES OF A CURIOUS LEARNER…LOL
WATCH OUT FOR PART II

By: Adenike Bello

My Firewood, Your Matches, His Pot Of Soup

If I may ask, how many relationships have you engaged in before getting married, or now as you are still single? In a nutshell, how many exes are you able to record? One, two, or probably uncountable. In as much as this piece is not targeted to make us remember how many failures we have recorded over the years, it is essentially pointing towards a vital angle of general perception of life and certain things we should get abreast of as we journey through this lane of exposition.

So many times we move closer to a person based on their attractiveness which could be their outward appearances, and some cases where we are privileged to hear them converse, which can be regarded as their intelligence, or in rare cases where we are chanced to know how they behave which is graded as moral. However, people majorly venture into a relationship firstly because of the outward appearance and a need for the man to have the wherewithal to cater for the needs of the lady, and these make other attributes secondary in most cases, except for the preachers that have set moral as a major standard that cannot be excused in a relationship race.

As a man, I have engaged in different relationships which have been challenging, as well as profitable to my existence but in the end, some lucky men tapped in and I lost all. I deposited alot in a relationship, another man deposited his, but a man from no where ended up walking down the aisle with the woman. My firewood, your matches, cooked the soup, and unfortunately, a man owns the whole pot of soup. This is applicable to all gender, no gender is exceptional. Can I be tagged a fool after spending so much and not appreciated? I gladly say 'NO'! Lessons are meant to groom one in order to be aware of eminent dangers. LIFE TEACHES US TO TRUST PEOPLE, BUT NOT TO DEPEND ON THEM, BECAUSE HUMAN BEINGS ARE LIABLE TO CHANGES.

In every relationship, learn to care and cherish, but try as much as possible not to be immoral, and if it works, great! But if it doesn't, you have learned. Every trial is a step to achieving greater opportunity that leads to greater achievement, if properly used. SOON, IT WILL BE 'YOUR FIRE WOOD, HER MATCHES, AND MY OWN POT OF SOUP!' BECAUSE WE WILL ALL END UP GETTING MARRIED TO SOMEONE ELSE'S ADMIRER OR EX. REMEMBER IT MUSN'T BE JUST A POT OF SOUP THAT WON'T COMPLEMENT YOUR BOWL OF RICE OR GARRI.

HOW I RAISED A MONSTER

As a father and husband in some parts of Nigeria, there is always a craving for birthing a male child. This usually comes to play when the first child happens to be a female, and the pressure unconsciously arouse due to ego, self esteem, family and friends' expectations, heir to inheritance factor, and some other reasons.  The man of the house begins to consider some health factors that could have championed the female birth syndrome in him or his spouse. This consideration mostly gives birth to trying out other women in order to get a chance of male child conception, especially when the second child unfortunately turns out to be a female.

The part of some mother and father-in- laws often cause what is known as ravages of frustration on the woman, simply because they have a myopic view that she should be powerful enough to give the family a male child. Meanwhile, this is subjected to some scientific measures which have certain implications and outcomes, that have mostly to do with the posture of couples during sexual intercourse, the chromosomes carried by the two partners, and the times of exposure to sex. Many homes have been torn apart due to this overrated gender preference that most couples and in laws crave for, and this has little or many negative effects on the society in most cases.

Nevertheless, in some homes where they are 'lucky' to have a male or some male children, there use to be preferences in the assignment of duties. Have you ever seen a rule that says it is a taboo for a male child to know how to cook well, wash dishes, clean the house, especially the toilet and bathroom, but he can wash car and run financial errands in the home? I am yet to see one, and none has been passed to law. Most of our parents have deviated by raising their male children like monsters that should do little or nothing in the house simply because they are heirs and other younger and elder sisters should be answerable to their domestic needs.

This belief has however handicapped most bachelors. How? There is an inherent lazy nature in them, and this has caused most of them to depend on girlfriends for meals, and they have turned to victims of tin (canned) foods which can be cancerous most times, victims of canteen and restaurants foods which might jeopardise their health after so much exposure to such meals. This menace has contributed to reliance of male children on female children virtually in everything today. It has become a trend that a female child must work harder, hold a public office, and in most cases be career driven before they can meet a marriageable standard. There is now a role reversal in most homes as some men have forgotten that they are the original providers, while the women are meant to support. Some women have turned to an automated teller machine of their husbands as well as home keepers, without little or no form of appreciation but frustration in most cases.

In as much as we cannot rule out the position of the woman as a home keeper, she should also be loved for multi tasking, keeping of the home, and going out of her way to provide financially for the home. So many women that clamour for gender equality today are mostly victims of males heinous activities that made them independent one way or the other, and this is posing a threat in most homes as a wife feels she has equal rights as the man because she does what the man engages in financially.

This is not a feminism push, but a reminder to our parents that nothing stops us from raising our children to be caring and loving by teaching them every bit of domestic chores in order to make them have a sense of responsibility to others, as well as to inculcate good habit of assistance and the zeal to be hard working in all ramifications. An enthusiast believes that greater goals can be achieved by teaming up for better outcome. Our mothers should raise their children equally irrespective of the gender, because there is a notion that some over kept males maltreat and abuse women in most cases. LET US STOP RAISING MONSTERS WITH NO HUMAN FEELINGS!

How Some Nigerian Universities Derailed

You wonder why some universities are no more what they used to be in the 80s and 90s? A lot of water has passed under the bridge without filter, and this has caused a great damage which a dam has no where-withal to hold the influx. Whenever we look deep into the system, a thought that comes to mind is that the highest authority should have the enormous power to curtail the excesses in the university government, but the reverse is the case.

In recent times, most of the members of the authority are gunning after the unseen, like being heads of the confraternity, laying down sentimental rules for the acceptance of students, which originally should be based on merit, placing money above primary assignment, especially the ones that come with bribe,  appreciation of immoral dealings, which mostly come as scratching of backs to get high grades, and so on.

It is quiet embarrassing when your wards/children come back home with certain cultures imbibed from school, without any strict measure put in place by the authority to shun such indictment of modern day schooling. The system is majorly focused on the business aspect of the education sector, thereby ignoring whatever vices that may be attached. Most students have however resulted to lecturer-student relationship in order not to be an outcast in a class, eventhough it may come with certain price. Sentiment has eaten deep into the system that preference has set in while awarding scores, and has made it so difficult to spot those who merit the upper grades from those that are judged by sentiment.

The university system of the old had certain hiccups, but not as noticeable as the modern day system, where backlogs of students who ought to have graduated rest in a file till some dates the certificate would have been forgotten by the students affected.  The lecturers should think back to the past, if they were groomed the way they operate now, or it's a new norm to be celebrated.

Weighing our options,  should university system continue this way, dropouts will be uncountable, and most parents will prefer to use their hard earned money to set a business for their wards and children instead of pumping it into a system where the certificate will be useless, couple with the immorality that their children will be exposed to. Moreover, entrepreneurship is encouraged, and white collar jobs are scarcely available.  The authority in the universities should have a rethink if eventually they wouldn't be affected by this social menace that has brought about moral decadence to the system. This has however given students a wide space to practice the unthinkable we hear and see in recent days, and the security put in place is handicapped to succumb the pressure being mounted on the university system that has turned into a den of robbers, prostitutes, and cheats.

What Momma Never Taught Me...

In every home, there is always a place for tutors. The place of a mother as a great tutor cannot be replaced, but despite all the tutorials gotten from a little tiny beginning, there is one thing mother forgot to teach me. Right from birth, she taught me how to suckle on her breast, she pressed her nipple to my mouth for me to get the little drop of milk to quench my thirst. After four months, she cushioned the chair for me to learn how to sit by myself. I thought to myself, could she have been tired of carrying me to and from the house? No! She just wanted me to learn.

Her curiosity wouldn't end at that, but she continued to teach me how to crawl, and sometimes she forgot she was not a four legged creature, all in the name of teaching me how to start a beautiful beginning.  The furniture helped my happy feet to stand, and momma held my two hands to keep them walking. Fortunately! that little baby has started walking, courtesy, momma the tutor. She never stopped being a tutor, because her zeal to keep my head up high remained. She taught me my assignment to a stage i grew to inquire from colleagues and leacturers on how to deal with difficult tasks/assignment, and this added a feather to her cap because I am now a university graduate.

A kitchen they say, belongs to a woman, but this saying could not have been applicable to me if mother never taught me her cooking skills. I learnt how to do the boiling, frying, grilling,  and the whole kitchen magic from the ever relentless woman. She never underestimated the roles of moral and etiquette as she passed that down as well. How to clean up the gabbage, the sitting and dinning rooms, the kitchen, the scrubbing of the bathroom and toilet, and never to ignore, my personal room became my hobby. Above all, she created a personal altar where I learnt to make all my supplications and also to pray fervently.

Indeed momma has tried a great deal! But she never taught me something. This thing in question is something some primary school pupils have known even when their parents are boldly assure of their innocence.  And the thing is 'Love Making" which most people refer to as SEX. Have you ever wondered how your kids got to know how to have SEX without you teaching them? Have you ever been caught in bed with daddy in a compromising position by your kids? Or your usual habit of caressing and french kissing while your kid is standing must have given him/ her a clue? Have you ever thought that your maids must have been trying out something silly with your boy or girl? Or her teacher has not been keeping an eye on the pupils that they have tried something romantically new amongst themselves? Did you ever think that the next door neighbour coming as a friend has a mission? Maybe your kid is a victim of rape already? All these questions are advisable for parents to ask themselves, especially mothers.

Frankly speaking,  momma taught me so many things, but she never taught me how to have "SEX", so how did I know it? KEEP YOUR KIDS AWAY FROM THE THINGS THEY SHOULDN'T KNOW UNTIL THE RIGHT TIME...IT'S AN ABUSE WHEN THEY GET EXPOSED TO IT BEFORE THE RIGHT TIME.